How to overcome feeling of being inferior and comparing the self with others? A spiritual guide and princles in life that matter the most. How to think? What is the right path to walk in life?
Original email we received from Vaishali Sharma on 28 Sep 2018
Om Shanti! My name is Vaishali Sharma and I am a first year MBBS Student. The problem that I am facing currently is related to comparing my life with a girl who lives in my colony. She's a BA Graduate and gives home tution as a part time course and has an average income. She doesn't have a very strong financial background and her family doesn't give her financial support. But despite all this she's able to afford to travel here and there almost every day and that too in a car ;eat at expensive restaurants ; drinks expensive beer; wears branded clothes and makeup. And a huge credit goes to her boyfriend for the kind of lavish lifestyle she lives. Her mother and brother despite knowing all this don't scold her, rather they promote her for doing this. I on the other hand have never betrayed my parent's trust and I have always been a sincere girl. But for the past 1.5 to 2 years I have been comparing my life with hers. And during this time I was actually viewing her Instagram account almost regularly which further destroyed my self esteem because I was able to see that she was having fun in her life. I struggled a lot just to earn my MBBS seat and the journey was never like a cakewalk but I couldn't help comparing my life with hers because she was always chilling around with her friends and boyfriend. Whereas I faced tremendous pressure, criticism, failures, disappointments and a wave of conflicting emotions. I still feel sometimes that God has been unfair to me and has been kind to her for he didn't gave her a struggling life. My teachers and parents used to say that after passing 10th one should work hard and focus on career and studies or else you will have to live a struggling life for the next 50-60 years. She didn't work hard but still she's enjoying and happy. I know that I have so much to be grateful to God but I'm just not able to appreciate the things and people he has blessed me with. How to deal with this? Please help.
Your message is received and read. Read with attention.
Very strange to see how India, a country of culture and religion, the most ancient and important land has changed in few years. Before, good life was considered to be the one in which we get peace of mind, in which we stay away from all bad, in which we fulfill our responsibilities and then we struggle, work hard, but at last get the real success. This is called ''life''. Going here and there, drinking, etc. is a task of a human beings who has lost the way of life. There is no real happiness in this. Person may only look happy. Real happiness lies in doing what is not against the Dharma.
Always remember Vaishali, in your life, at every single point, you will have 2 choice.
One of those 2 is right and better. Mostly the right choice looks difficult. A wise person should not be attracted in temporary pleasures.
And see, it is not your bad fortune, that you are safe and away from such a life, but it is a better fortune. This you should know that one who walks on right path, does not indulge in bad karma, shall definitely get everything that life has to offer. Hard work is best for this.
Hard work is dharma.
Celibacy is your dharma.
Helping to the needy, serving parents and thanking God is our Dharma.
Cleanliness, not harming anyone (non voilence) is our Dharma
If you walk on this path, there shall be temporary pain, sacrifices. After this, is bright light, which is great reward.
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